Eat, Drink and Be Merry

I'm tired. Really, really, really tired. I'm also achy, emotional and various other things, so as you can see not much has changed.

What has changed is that we are all much more aware of just how fragile I am physically and how my health is going to play a huge role in how long this pregnancy lasts.

We have been very fortunate throughout the past 17 weeks to not have any terrible scares with the babies. In fact, we really haven't had any scares at all since the very beginning. What we did have was a scare with me.

We've known all along that my caloric intake, liquid intake, etc had to increase tremendously. Unfortunately I hadn't realized just how much what I ingested and when would have such a huge effect on my ability to function on a day to day basis. So essentially I woke up last Saturday eager to get outside and enjoy the nice weather with the boys and West. I had my usual juice, but not my usual heavy breakfast. I ate toast on the way to the dog park with Owen (we were meeting Jake and West) and as soon as I got there I knew something was wrong. After resting for 10-15 minutes I started the very short walk back to our house. I continuously had to stop and make an effort to breath. I felt faint and exhausted. Finally after stopping several times I fell...twice. I had passed out cold and couldn't function. Thankfully, we had neighbors who were in the area and they brought out juice and a cereal bar. After I drank the juice, I was able to get up and waddle home. That incident landed me in the hospital overnight and left all of us extremely scared. Never again will you catch me doing anything without eating/drinking first.
Obviously the babies are all fine- they are just draining every ounce of everything I have out of me. The doctors explained that I had a low hemoglobin (my body isn't making enough blood), a low blood sugar, low potassium and dehydration. It's amazing that no matter how much I ingest, it's never going to be enough.

This experience showed me just how fragile I am right now- but it also showed me how fragile we all are on any given day. Jake and Owen fell witness to something very traumatic to them. Weston was left in the middle of a chaotic and frightening situation in which he was left to care for me, the boys and our crazy dog Hamilton. Once you go through something like that you have no choice but to acknowledge the possibilities, both good and bad, of what can happen at any given moment.

Thankfully we made it through last weekend unscathed. Family came together to help Weston with Jake and Owen (which I am so eternally grateful for), Weston managed everything so incredibly well and we've learned some very important lessons. Weston and the boys continue to take amazing care of me on a daily basis and I have to say I feel so blessed.

I am still trying, no matter what the circumstances, to maintain a sense of normalcy for Jake and Owen. Their lives are going to change so much, and I want to devote all of the time and energy I can to them right now. I took them to the zoo on Wednesday and we had such a great time just walking and talking (Obviously I ate a lot before we went, lol). That peaceful time is just so meaningful to me.

While we're all so excited to welcome our four new additions, we are also very aware that life will never be the same. That alone is reason enough to be scared.

As the pregnancy progresses, my emotions change quite often. At first we just wanted to make sure our children would ALL be happy and healthy. Now that we now that the babies are healthy, I worry about the effect of doubling our family will have on Jake and Owen. Of course, this often subsides to excitement of seeing the interaction between all of the children. But just as I take that minute to relax and enjoy those thoughts, I am left with the sinking feeling that something is bound to go wrong. It really is a roller coaster of emotions.

At 17 weeks, we are likely 1/2 way through this pregnancy. It's amazing, isn't it? The babies are roughly 1/2 pound each and fattening up as we speak. For obvious reasons we're hoping to stay pregnant as long as possible. However the reality is that we'll have the babies between 30-34 weeks. To prepare we've started the nursery, which is a great distraction from thinking too much.

We've also settled on names for all of them, which was a task in itself. So, joining Jakob Douglas and Owen Russell we have:

*Mary Elizabeth (Weston's mom is also named Mary. To honor Owen's request that we have a sister named Emmie, we've decided that we'll call Mary "EMMIE" for her initials- M.E.).
*Katherine Mae (Mae is my grandmother's middle name. We'll call her KATE).
*Benjamin Charles (Charles is Weston's middle name. We'll call him BEN).
*John George (Weston's father and brother who have both passed away were both named John George. John is also a nod to my mother, JoAnne which is the female form of John as well as my Great grandfather, John Kiefer. We'll likely call John "JOHN JOHN"

I'll admit, it took quite an effort to name them all :)

For now, I am going to go enjoy my time with Jake and Owen who are fighting over puzzle pieces. Not because they want to do a puzzle, but because they want to use the pieces as boomerangs. They are truly boys.